trial and error

Pork chop sandwich.... good.
Pork chop salad with pepper jack and feta cheese, tomatoes, and sunflower seeds..... not so good.
Maybe it was the ceasar dressing that did me in. The salad may have been better with thousand island or ranch.

Who knew doo-doo could make me so happy

Dion pooped in the potty last night!!!
It was his very first time and he probably won’t do it again without prompting for another two months, but dog gone it, I’m celebrating this!!!!
I had just taken off his diaper so he could take a bath. As soon as I got it off, he took off running for the other bathroom. (his bathroom, where I keep his potty stuff, and not the one we were in) He pulled out his stool, jumped on the commode and did his business.
I’m so proud because he did this without me prompting him to!!!
Who knew clumps of doo-doo could make a little, old mama so happy?

If you think I'm stupid, don't tell me.

Have you guys noticed that commercials are "dumbing" themselves down to the consumers?
The sad part is that they don't think that we've notice.
Take the newest adds for Toyota. In one of the adds, a potential Toyota buyers balls up an offer, tosses it in the trash and says, "Nice try, but I know you never take the first offer."
The salesman then reaches into the trash can, pulls out the waded up paper and offers it to the potential buyer again. Of course, the potential buyers now thinks his "new" deal is great. Did he not noticed the crumpled paper?
What about the guy in the funny glasses or the guy who has Gatorade dumped over him for "making such a winning deal."
Toyota is trying to use humor, but they are saying we, the consumer, are stupid idiots who will believe anything.
I know that they they are making fun of the whole car-buying experience, but to me it's just another example of the dealers thinking we are stupid.
Don't you remember some of the tricks they've used? They did not get that reputation for being honest and above board?
No one and I do mean no one should buy a new car unless they are paying cash. If you are paying a car note and insurance each month, you are not financially free. And now the average car loan is for six years? Who wants to pay for a car for six years? Five years was bad enough, but six?
By the time my son is an adult, I wouldn't be suprised if people were being offered 10 year car loans.
Thoughts?

Oh, if I had only paid more attention to mom in the kitchen.

My mom could whip up anything and it always tasted wonderful.
Even though I was a picky eater, I loved how she prepared veggies.
(If only I knew then what eating so much processed food would do to me. My brothers and sisters didn't have a weight problem as a child because mom and dad fed them from the fruits of the land. My parents grew or killed most of what my older siblings ate. When I came along, there were fewer kids and my mom had discovered white bread, mac and cheese and cheetos...LOL... The funny thing is my mom prepared spaghetti or rice for breakfast every morning and they were not fat. Rice and spaghetti were cheap and my parents could send their children off to school with a full tummy.)
Anyway, I'm a mom now and it's my job to prepare meals my son will long for.
I can't!!!
Last night I made greasy, salty, green beans and greasy, salty, semi-sweet corn.
I kept adding stuff to them to try to get that southern flavor I remembered. In the end I ended up with....well I've told ya.

Prior to my mom being in a nursing home, I would call her everyday and often got cooking tips from her. My sweet potatoes are to die for because of her advice last year.
Okay, I was working with canned and not fresh, which makes a difference I know.
I even went out and bought some salted pork hopping that was the key ingredient.
Man, what did mama put in those green beans to make them taste so good?
That's one good thing (there are plenty) that I am looking forward to about living with mama. I'm going to pick her brain as much as possible for all of the recipes she can still remember.
We made jelly a few years ago together. That was fun and the end product was good. I gave away a lot of jars.
I'm looking forward to learning at her helm.
Does anyone have a good recipe for green beans or collard greens?

No FWF!!!!!! (Fat Woman Fashion)

This has to end.... for all fat women across the world!!!!
What fat woman in their right mind looks at this and says, "Yes, I must stick this on my body and walk around so everyone I know will see me in this."

Fat women across the world, we have to unite and stop purchasing these items that manufacturers want to pass off as fashion for the fat woman.
Repeat after me....
No big honking flowers on every thing!!!!
No sequence placed in wierd locations!!!!!
No pleats right under our boobs.
No more shirts with those stupid bands at the bottom. It's a cup for our stomach, you know.
No turtle necks that makes our triple chins look like four chins.
No 100 percent polyester. Are you trying to make us sweat the weight off?
No more of my money until you start respecting me as a consumer.

I am a beautiful, fat diva of a woman who wants good looking, good quality clothes!!!!!
Period!!!!

Am I enough for now?

Dion and I were at a little gathering on the Fourth of July that included children his age and their moms and dads.
There was a 2-year-old boy there who was just hanging on to his father. There was a 2 year-old little girl there who was also hanging on to her father. Dad even gathered her pink, little princess bag and took her to the bathroom so he could change her diaper.
The little girl hugged her daddy and gave him a kiss. The little boy and his father were kind of rough housing and tickling each other.
On the outside looking in, these men seemed to be involved in their children's lives.
I couldn't help but notice how Dion looked at this and in my mind, I think it was with longing.
Now, I know at the age of 2 he really doesn't get the concept of mommy and daddy. He does get the concept of people loving him and I know he knows that I love him.
But there are times - like Tuesday - that makes me wonder if I am enough for now?

A NEWLY RELEASED STUDY by a team of family scholars finds that marriage typically brings a host of important benefits to African American men, women, and children. On average, married African Americans are wealthier, happier, and choose healthier behaviors than their unmarried peers, and their children typically fare better in life --differences that seem to stem largely from marriage itself. At the same time, however, African American women tend to benefit from marriage less than Whites and men. These are among the key findings presented in The Consequences of Marriage for African Americans, a first-of-its-kind report based on reviews of 125 social science articles and a new statistical analysis of national survey data. The study was conducted by leading family scholars under the auspices of the Institute for American Values, a nonpartisan think-tank based in New York City.

Study after study have shown that children who are raised in a single, usually female-headed household, are more likely to end up in trouble with the law, drop out of high school, become parents too young, have lower economic clout, not go to college and so-on and so on.
Now, this does not mean that just because you come from a single parent home that this will happen. I know that environment is a factor, too. Often, young single mothers do not have the support of their families financially, which means they end up taking what ever kind of jobs they can find to support themselves and their children. Without that support, they can end up in low-paying jobs that doesn't have much chance for advancement or offer many benefits. That can begin a cycle of not seeing many people succeed and thus their not succeeding themselves and not knowing that they could.
I know the data.
And I also know that just having a dad in the home is not a guarantee that my son will fare better.
But I can't deny that there is a very strong bond between men and their sons. My brother, Renda, was shoveling snow in March so his wife could have a path to get our of my car and make it into the house without slipping. He then helped her into the house. When their son was shot and killed in November, I saw how my brother went to his wife's side anytime she cried and just tried to comfort her. He really is a good man and I told him in March how proud I was of the man he has become. I've told him this on occasions before. And my brother said, "If only daddy could see me now."
Men want their father's approval. They know they will have their mom's love, but they want their father's love, respect and approval.
I can't give Dion all of that. He needs a man in his life.
And it will be my job to find a good man, a good husband, a good father.
Even if their dads make mistakes when they are younger, men never stop wanting their fathers to do better and to be better. They somehow take some pride in it if they are the catalyst that creates a change in their fathers.
I know that right now I have made a choice to raise Dion by myself, but I pray that he does not reach adulthood without having someone to say "Daddy" to.
It is my job to make good choices in selecting a good man who will be a good husband for me and a great father for Dion.
I just pray that when that man finds me (as the Bible states) that I know how to relinquish some of the power of running of being the head of my household.

"I turned the computer on all by myself."

My niece made the above statement to me Saturday. She was so proud. To be honest, I was proud, too.
It means that we should be able to communciate with each other more frequently.
The thing is, my niece is my age....
Now, I would tell you how old she is or will be on July 13, but that would mean that I would have to reveal my age.
I am not doing that!!!
I will tell you that she is two months and a day younger than me.
I'm the last of the second generation within my family. She is the first of the third. She is my sister's and her husband's oldest child and my parents' first grandchild.
The cool thing about her is that we are friends and relatives. We can go for months (and we do) without talking to each other. Yet, when ever we do talk again, there is never that odd silence where you have to search for something else to say. From the moment we say "Hello", we know that it could be a marathon conversation.
I love that. I love her. And I love that she loves, respect and appreicates me.
It makes me love her and her family even more and it makes me want her to be happy.
In all the years that we've known each other, and I would guess that is all of our lives,(LOL) I don't remember her saying or hinting at something negative about me.
Man, I love that.
She is also very pretty, as you can tell by the above photo. Which one is she? She's the one in the back with the big smile.
And I've always thought that she has some of the cutest legs, which of course you can't see in that photo - muscular yet femimine. I don't remember when they got that way, but they are like that now.
Though I have 33 nieces and nephews, 30 great-nieces and nephews and one great-great nephew, I have only one who refuses and I mean refuses to call me "Aunt Cynt."

"I can't call you aunt. That just seems wierd." she once said when we were real young and I was determined to get all of them to call me aunt cynt. (Can anyone say power trip?? LOL).

Plus, the aunt-niece thing would have taken too much explanation when we were kids.

So we often introduced each other as "cousin" back in the day or let folks assume what they wanted.

My niece "Shar" as I call her, used to be so shy. She was always a smart, stylish girl, but she used to be so shy, quiet and reserved.

No one who knows her now would believe that!!!!!

My mom kept Shar, and her sister, Laura, (who is one year younger than us) one summer when we really young. Well, they visited a lot of summers, but this was one of those summers from ..... Well you know???
I stuck a nail in my toe and it actually came out the other side. Shar got her arm caught in one of those old, fashioned wringer washing machine. I know something happened to Laura that summer, too, but I can't remember what right now.
I used to love hanging out with Shar, Laura and their klan. I spent a lot of summer as a kid with them and have spent some time with them in adulthood. I hung out at Laura's house in October and we just laughed.
Both Laura and Shar (I've often wondered why when I refer to both of them, I always put Laura's name first though she is the youngest. Must be an alphabet thing in my head) have kids now. I can't get over how grown up their children are now.
Anyway, I am so happy that Shar doesn't need her children to help her turn on the computer anymore. Hopefully, we can keep in touch with each other a little more frequently.
And Shar, if you are reading this, I expect you to comment.
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